Kate @ Modern Loss

“By putting all our energy into pretending we’re unaffected by the worst, we block ourselves from the best. So let’s quit pretending. Let’s face the pain encamped in all of us and ask what it needs without flinching.

This is animal husbandry for dragons.”

I am once again thrilled to have an essay featured at the beautiful Modern Loss community:

Animal Husbandry for Dragons

What if we try caring for our pain, instead of trying to control it?

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It’s been on my mind since writing Notes for the Everlost: how radical it is to not turn away from pain, but toward it. Why should we do this? What’s that look like? What if taking care of pain is the way we take care of our future selves? And what you might be wondering, if you’re still new to grief: How — and when — will I stop either spitting or swallowing fire every time someone asks me how I’m doing?

Here’s to heat, loves. Heat is where fortitude grows.

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